www.chrisdarbro.com – Chris Darbro

I dont know if it’s something in the air, the time of year, or
what, but it seems lately a lot of people have been having trouble
with life or love, I hear about it from friends, friends of friends,
read it in people’s blogs, etc. With some people it’s not a big deal,
with others it’s more important than they give it credit for, and
why? because everyone has different ideas of love and like and lust,
and what it means to them. It’s something I dont think about too
often, so I figured id give my thoughts and stance on it. When it
comes to the Love, i suppose you could say im very old fashioned, and
somewhat of a romantic when it comes to it. The “L” word is a very
powerful one, and I dont just say it like it going out of style to
everyone. At least in relationships anyway. Ive had some interesting
ones over the past year, some lasting a decent amount of time,
(i.e. 2-3 months), and yet I dont think I dropped the “L” word once.
They were all mostly nice people, things ended on good terms, in
some of them there were almost love-like feelings, but like I said,
to me, love is a very powerful word. There’s a certain commitment
attached to it. To me, love is someone you’d give all of yourself for
without thinking twice. It’s someone who’s aide you’d do whatever you
could to rush to, day or night, near or far, no matter what obstacles
stood in your way. It’s always having an open ear and open heart, no
matter the circumtances. It’s being someone’s rock, always there,
throughout the wind and the rain, the hard times, being that one thing
someone can lean on and cling to when they’ve had their worst. It’s
other things as well, but you get the idea, I just didnt feel that
committed to those relationships, those people, hadnt known them
enough, I just take great care and concern when it comes to that word,
because it can cause a lot of hurt as well if misplaced, misused, or
mistimed. I surely wouldnt want to hurt anyone by saying it too soon
and something going sour soon after. It’s one of those things that I
put a lot of time and thought, brain and heart, into. If I were to
ever say it too early on, it’d have to be someone I really knew well,
it’d have to be someone really special.

When it comes to things like marriage, I take them just as much, if
not more seriously. Like I mentioned earlier, im quite old fashioned,
and as such, dont believe in marriage until the couple’s been
together from quite some time, and even been engaged for a reasonable
amount of time. I also am against people who just marry right out of
high school, I think people should have a few years after high school
to have fun, and experience life, before hopping into marriage. Even
if the person is dating someone seriously, that’s fine, I still
believe there’s a huge difference between serious dating and marriage.
Marriage is serious, and something you are locked into and commited
to for life.(at least by my standards.) I don’t believe in divorce,
I believe marriage is for life. I dont care how tough things get
between any couple, it can always be worked out. There’s so many
people divorcing these days, over the dumbest things, kids now having
to grow up in broken homes, it upsets me. Seems the only marriages
working and happy and lasting for life are the ones of older people,
who grew up with those values of marriage instilled in them. Some
people believe that way, but fear marriage because they fear they’re
partner might divorce them over some little thing down the road, I say,
as long as whom you are marrying holds those values and beliefs just
as true as you do (assuming you do of course), then the marriage will
be a long and happy one.

Sometimes when dating various people, you sometimes need help
deciphering the things your heart and head argue about. I’ve seen this
happen with people a lot lately, even myself included. a while back
someone asked me about a situation they were in, various guys were on
this girls mind, she’d kind of dated them all at some point, some she
was currently kinda crushing on, some crushing on her, and was trying
to figure out how to make up her mind. I told her obviously I couldnt
solve her problem, she’d have to figure it out on her own, but I gave
her this piece of advice to try: Take a couple of times when the guy
was the at his best, or the best times in the relationships, then take
some of the times when the guy was at his worst, or the worst times in
the relationships, some of the times when the guy in each made her feel
the best, some of the times when the guy hurt her the most, take all
of those times in each relationship, then put all the other guys in
each others places in those same situations in her mind, and think
about what each of the other guys would have done in those situations,
if they would have hurt her the same, less or more so, if, in the happy
sweet and kinder moments and situations if the others would have made
her happier, or less, if the moments would have been better or worse,
what the other guys would have done or treated her like in all those
situations. If they would have been more or less understanding in
some of the situations, more or less caring, etc. unfortunatly that was
quite a while ago, i cant remember who i told that to, but I still
believe it was one of the better pieces of advice Ive given in my life,
and to this day, that sort of ‘compare and contrast’ kind of reasoning
has helped me in many situations, and continues to, even to this very
day, and it’s even kind of given me good guidance at times during the
past few weeks when I’ve been faced with tough times. Things are doing
a bit better though i think, I should have a bew job in a couple weeks,
which will be awesome, it’s someting less to stress about lately, so
I’ve been a little happier. Everything else has been alright lately
I suppose, still a lot on my mind. Havent been up to too much fun
lately, I’ve found myself bored a lot lately, mainly cause I was tight
on cash at one point, and my roommate’s been at work a lot, and my
schedule was conflicting with others of my friends, I did go to a
party at a friends house last friday, that was fun, went and visited
my parents for mothers day last week, went to check out the new
bowling alley and say hi to missy, that was fun, and my bowling
score was terrible, but fun none the less. But other than that
I havent been up to a whole lot lately. Anyway, hope everyone’s
doing well, and of course, I’ll update as the next crazy event
happens in my life, of course, knowing me, that could be just around
the corner.